This may come as a surprise to some of you, but I am a big Friday the 13th fan. Like, it’s kind of silly how much of a fan I am. When I was a kid, I was terrified of Jason. I was terrified of potato sack-head Jason and then, hockey mask Jason. If I was away, camping, with my family when I was younger, I couldn’t sleep most of the time. I was convinced that Jason was watching us from the trees, waiting for us to sleep so he could murder us one by one. The only thing my parents learned from this was to not let me watch horror movies.
I continued to watch them. And the more I watched, the more interested I became in horror. I wanted to know more about the killers. I wanted to know more so that I could lessen the terror they caused me. Fear is usually about the unknown. If I knew more, then I thought my fear would dissipate.
And when I was younger, Jason scared me the most.
After Friday the 13th, The Final Chapter, the series started (for me) to fall apart.
Each installment became sillier. The fear was gone. But still, I watched them all. And although they were silly, they were entertaining to one degree or another and there was the nostalgia factor. Jason was still doing his Jason thing and the teens were still doing their teen thing. And then, there was, JASON X.
I watched this again the other day for the hell of it. And it was still terrible but also really fun to watch. Here’s why.
Get this: The government tries to execute Jason. They can’t. Each time they kill him, he comes back to life. Then they decide that it might be useful to learn why he can’t be killed and maybe apply that knowledge to their own soldiers to create a super soldier. You with me, so far? Isn’t this hilarious?
As you can guess, this goes wrong. Jason kills a bunch of soldiers and when he is chasing after the one scientist who thought the whole super soldier idea was a bad one, Jason is cryogenically frozen by that scientist. Before he is completely frozen, he stabs this scientist through the metal chamber he was locked in and before she can bleed out, she is frozen too. Now, fast forward 455 years. Yeah. Still with me? How awesome is this?
The Earth can no longer sustain life. Scavengers find Jason and this scientist. Using nano-technology, an android, and medicine from the future, they bring the scientist back to life. They think Jason cannot be salvaged. But as you already know, he comes back to life. Now it’s Jason on a spaceship, in space, killing all the crew members and the space soldiers on the ship. Just typing this out is making me smile.
Jason is killing them all and seems unstoppable. Then they upgrade the android and she takes Jason out. Half his head is blown off, one arm is shot off and a leg is also blown off. They leave him there, thinking he can’t come back from that. Right? Wrong again.
The nanorobots spill over Jason and because there isn’t enough of his tissue to reconstruct him, the nanos use the metal of the ship to complete his resurrection. Uber Jason is born.
I forgot how funny this movie was. But even though I enjoyed it, I really wish a reboot of the series could bring back that terror I once felt. It’s supposed to be a horror movie after all.
What was your favorite Friday the 13th film? Let me know. I’m curious.
Have a great week. Be kind to everyone.